Pickles and Impending Motherhood

Hehe, that title got your attention, didn’t it? 😆 While I do have a serious dill pickle craving going on at the moment, impending motherhood is definitely not the reason. Heaven forbid! I can’t think of anything I’d want less at this point in my life. Babies are delightful and all that, but I’m way, way, way over that craving. Just so you know. I never craved pickles when I was pregnant, but it is considered the norm for pregnant women, and I’ve been reading a few blogs which talk about impending and/or new motherhood. The power of suggestion is an amazing thing, yes? 🙂

Anyway, this post really isn’t about pickles. Rather, I wanted to point you in the direction of a couple of blogs that are well worth visiting regularly. And it was the pickles thing that jogged the memory. My thoughts might be a bit convoluted sometimes, but there truly is a method to the madness!!

Kinuk has a great blog, which I’ve been following for ages now. She’s a rather splendid person all ’round, and the fact that she grew up in Winnipeg doesn’t hurt her street cred any, either! Nor does the fact that she lived near Richard’s old stomping ground in England for some time before moving back to Poland. Small world, eh?! She’s also about to become a first time mother this summer, so that has added a whole new blogging subject for her. And rightfully so. It’s your blog, hon, so talk about this life-changing event as much as you want to! There’s lots of other great stuff on her blog, though, so do go and have a look if you have a few spare minutes.

Another blog, richly deserving of a shout out is Roberta’s. I’ve been following her blog for ages, too, and invariably find myself nodding away in agreement as I read each of her posts. Or smacking my forehead because she came up with a concept that I should have thought of long ago! 😉 She’s a fabulous story-teller, very “real”, and has the knack for getting to the heart of a matter in a very common sense sort of way. Her entire blog is worth a thorough perusal, but I’ve pointed you to one recent post which I thought was especially good … and so typically Roberta!

Kinuk might want to go and read that post, actually, as it pertains to her present condition. It might also balance some of the scary stuff and unsolicited, unhelpful advice that women like to throw at those going through their first pregnancy. I don’t know why women do that to each other, but some can’t seem to help themselves. If you ask me a specific question I’ll answer it as honestly as I can, but I never, ever, ever throw advice at moms-to-be, or new moms, just for the sake of it. I hated it so much when I was in their shoes, so made a vow then and there to never do it to anyone myself. I’ve also hated the interference of others while Stephanie was growing up, because I have never parented “by the rules”. From day one I let my instincts be my guide, and they have never steered me wrong. The only times I wandered off the path, to Stephanie’s detriment, were when I let the interfering voices temporarily overpower my own instincts. But I always shut them out eventually, and got back on track. Each child is a unique individual with their own personality and needs, and nobody knows a child more than a mother, regardless of what the experts might think.

Roberta totally hit it on the head with her rant about all of the unnecessary pressures on parents these days, which totally spoil the entire experience for both parents and child. The only thing that I can think of to add to her thoughts is the advice given to me by Stephanie’s pediatrician, the day we were discharged from hospital after her birth. “Throw away the books, shut your ears to advice and criticism, and slam the door on anyone who comes in and tries to take over. This is your child and you already know her better than anyone ever will. You have wonderful parenting instincts. Listen to them, and you’ll never, ever go wrong.” Which is essentially what Roberta said, and what I hope Kinuk will be able to do, in this increasingly “noisy” age of parenting.

So, to end with a question, do any of the rest of you have truly helpful, encouraging thoughts for Kinuk and any other mom-to-be, who might stumble by here?


4 thoughts on “Pickles and Impending Motherhood

  1. Each generation has so many differences, I mean look what they have now that we didn't…all the gadgets and gizmo's!The best thing is just to love em up!:)

  2. At the risk of sounding like a grumpy old woman, don't you think we were happier with less, than today's kids are with more, EB?And yup, love is all that really matters to a child. 🙂

  3. Ahhhh..thank you so much for the link and the lovely things you wrote about my blog! 🙂 I'm wondering over to read Roberta's post right now.As for the advice…I'm finding that the more secure a mother and the more children she has had, the less advice she seems to offer. My Mum has told me that I'll know what I will have to do…it's natural and instinctive. My husband feels it's one of those “learn as you go along” things. I'm a little worried, but excited at the same time. Such a big change in our lives!Thanks again, Eleanor! 🙂

  4. You're very welcome, Kinga. Praise where it's due, you know! :)Your mum has it exactly right. I also totally agree with your comment about secure mothers being less inclined to share advice. It's a steep learning curve in the beginning, but we all manage in our own way. Of course you're a little worried right now as motherhood is a great unknown to you. But from what I've learned about you through your blog, you're going to be just fine. Promise! 🙂

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